The All Star Team that never will be

A wolf in sheeps clothing? or is it the real deal?

Can a hypothetical rag tag bunch of alternative Australian sports stars make a decent Rugby League team?

When I was a kid, I didn’t have posters of Spiderman or Superman on my wall, my superheroes were sports stars. In my boyhood imagination, I was convinced that my favourite sports players could do ANYTHING; just like superheroes. That's why, when I had to ‘create a player’ for (insert video game here), his name would be either Matthew Hayden or Mark Waugh. I’m pretty sure my first ever ‘Sims’ character was named Darren Lockyer. It’s also why, when this news story came out I pretty much wet myself. And without a doubt, one of the best nights of my life was at Ian Healy’s testimonial match, where Pat Rafter hit Allan Langer for three of the biggest sixes I have ever seen.

I've have had enough of League players playing different sports. It's time some of this movement went the other way around.

So For a little bit of fun, I’ve put together a team of League stars that never will be. My conditions are:
1. the player cannot be in any of the four major football codes (League, Union, Soccer and AFL);
2. the player must be currently participating in their original sport (sorry to all those penciling Boonie into a prop position); and
3. there is a maximum of two representatives per sport (so no filling the backline with track and field stars).

Fullback: Patrick Mills (Basketball)

NRL Comparison: Matt Bowen

With blazing speed (pun intended) and the skills to match, the Australian point guard would be the dynamic fullback and defensive speed bump that all good sides need.

Wing: Steve Hooker (Athletics)

NRL Comparison: Israel Folau

He’s quick, he’s agile, and he can out jump anyone – probably even Big Izzy himself.

Centre: Shannon Eckstein (Iron Man)

NRL Comparison:  Mark Gasnier

At 6ft 1, this Iron Man champion provides some size to the lineup and would be one of the few players with the fitness to last a full 80 minutes of Rugby League.

Centre: Simon ‘the Wizard’ Whitlock (Darts)

NRL Comparison: ???

Born and raised in Cessnock (reportedly around the corner from the Johns boys), The Wizard probably has more drinking stamina than athletic stamina. However, given he has a cool nickname, and an even cooler beard, he must make the side. Plus, I’m sure he could throw some pretty accurate cut out passes.

Wing: John Steffensen (Athletics)

NRL Comparison: Billy Slater

He's Fast, He's had spectacular results in the past, but has a tendency not to show up on big occassions. Perfect winger really. (see Hayne, Jarryd)

Five-Eighth: Anthony Mundine (Boxing)

NRL Comparison:  Anthony Mundine

Without a doubt, Mundine would be the best player of this team. As such, Mundine needs to be the key playmaker and creator in this side.  Plus he is used to throwing punches that miss so he would be right at home in the league style fights.

Halfback: Lleyton Hewitt (Tennis)

NRL Comparison:  Alfie Langer

Hewitt’s greatest asset in tennis is his court speed and agility. At his peak, Hewitt’s athletic ability and sheer determination would keep rallies alive when they should have been over. Hewitt’s speed and grit are what’s needed at Halfback. Plus he would provide passionate post try celebrations.

Prop: Andrew Bogut (Basketball)

NRL Comparison:  David Taylor

Given there are no 7 footers in league, finding an NRL comparison was tough. But it’s all about size here. I’m sure a 7 footer taking the first hit up of a league game would be a sight to see. Plus we will finally have a player who is better than Steve Price at chargedowns. And on top of that, he will bring his own supporter base to the game.

Hooker: Jamie Whincup (Motorsport)

NRL Comparison:  Ben Elias

Placing 2^nd in the first season of Rexona’s Australia’s greatest athlete was clearly an impressive feat for Jamie Whincup. If he can beat out Andrew Symonds and Lote Tuquiri, the surely he deserves his spot in the side.

Prop: Damon Kelley (Weightlighting)

 NRL Comparison: Mark Tookey

Don’t know who Damon Kelley is? He looks like he’d be hard to tackle.  On another note, When Ray Warren would scream “Tookey” every time Mark Tookey ran the ball up has got to be in the all time top ten ‘best things about rugby league’.

Second Row: Shane Watson (Cricket)

NRL Comparison:  Ben Creagh

He might be made of glass, but the Australian Cricket Vice-Captain has the frame and strength to add some muscle to the forwards. His inclusion also increases the quality of the WAGS.

Second Row: Geoff Huegill (Swimming)

NRL Comparison: Sam Thaiday

He might be a more effective weapon at his ‘pre return to swimming’ weight, but I think Skippy would be this teams' impact forward. Much like the role that Sam Thaiday plays.

Lock: Danny Green (Boxing)

 NRL Comparison: Paul Gallen

Green is an obvious choice at Lock for this lineup. He would bring toughness to forwards, and be the team’s enforcer. He would probably need to play the ‘don’t hurt our playmaker’ role (See Carroll, Tonie) given Hewitt’s probable lack of defensive ability.

Selector and Coach: Andrew Hilditch (Cricket)

Well he knows nothing about Cricket; give him a shot at Rugby League.

I think this is a pretty good team. Surley they would give the last placed Gold Coast Titans a run for their money.
Have I left anyone out? What do you think?